In Kanye's legendary album, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, Ye drops one of the hardest lyrics of all time: "how you say broke in Spanish? Me no hablo." Kanye is refering to his extensive wealth and the fact he doesn't speak broke. It's a double entendre(I think I spelt that wrong) because Kanye is also saying he doesn't know a lot of Spanish. That is what Kanye and I have in common. I literally don't know how to say the word "broke" in Spanish. I don't know how to say a lot of words in Spanish and currently that's one my many challenges as a missionary. I grind and grind words throughout the day and Spanish study, so when it comes time to some lessons I can apply them. Then the lesson comes and I'm still reduced to talking like a preschooler. Ever since I've gotten to Florida this has frustrated me and I have been doubting myself and abilities.
However, on Halloween we spent an entire afternoon trying to find people to teach in a Walmart parking lot. We were nearing the end of our finding session, when we saw a Hispanic woman putting groceries away in her car. We offered to help her out and then give a message where my trainers introduced us and gave a message of Christ. Apparently, she had met with the missionaries before and with tears in her eyes said she loved the word of God, but she was too busy and dropped them.Then it was my turn to speak and I said in Spanish something along the lines of, "We are always here for you and Jesus is here for you always. He loves you and he gives us peace in our lives." She just started really crying right there saying how she misses the word of God and needed to hear what I said in that moment. Twas a humbling experience for me, and for her as well. Double humbled.
The doubt that I had, the gramitical errors, and my personal frustration did not matter to the Lord in that moment, nor will it ever. I didn't need to be fluent in Spanish for the Lord to have the ability to work through me. He just needed me to be worthy and to try. This had made me proud of my progress rather than discouraged and it changed my mindset about progression in general. People have always told me "the Lord will magnify your efforts." I never really understood what they meant until that afternoon. The Lord will take my missionary efforts and make them more impactful than I ever could on my own. My testimony in trusting in the Lord is growing every day. The Lord can magnify your efforts as well.
Now, because you have the Lord magnifying you does that mean you don't have to try? No. If I didn't try to learn Spanish He would have nothing to magnify. So if you humbly try your best in whatever you're doing and if it's God's will, He will give you the help you need to overcome your obstacles.
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." Ether 12:27
Invitation: Please pray for Marta that she can free up time to meet with us. She is still really busy and can't find time right now even though she really wants to.
Remember you are loved and life is good.
Peace and Love,
Elder Adamson
Song stuck in my head: Dark Fantasy by Kanye West
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